Some women are mentally strong and some aren’t. And today, we’re looking into what mentally strong women don’t do!
However, strength is not a fixed trait, as it changes depending on your situation.
It’s not something to be embarrassed about, and it’s something you can work on.
It’s not even fair that some women come out of their childhood and adolescent years unscathed, while others have to deal with a web of issues.
It’s not their fault, but it’s the way it is.
Your biology, environment, socioeconomic background, education, and support system all play a major role in how mentally strong you’ll be as an adult.
The first step to fixing this is to recognize the patterns that you follow.
So let’s look at 15 Things Mentally Strong Women DON’T Do.
If you consistently do any of these things, then you know what you need to work on.
Don’t worry if you don’t feel like reading; you can enjoy the video below or watch it on YouTube:
1
Don’t allow a problem to linger for too long
This is a blanket statement that applies to almost anything in life.
It can be a problem with a colleague at work, an issue with your friend, or a plumbing issue at home.
A problem that lingers is more likely to overwhelm you and mentally strong women know that they have to deal with the problem before it gets to that point.
2
Don’t avoid confrontation
It’s not that they enjoy it or welcome it but they know that directly confronting the issue is the best way to get what they want without upsetting the person too much.
Instead of seeing confrontation as a battle, they see it as an opportunity to communicate with someone else, understand their perspective, and explain where they’re coming from.
Confrontation is a golden opportunity if you go in there with confidence.
It’s something you need to be afraid of.
3
Don’t beat around the bush
Mentally strong women don’t beat around the bush.
For years, women have been told to say things “nicely.”
Being nice takes a few extra words, some compliments, and letting people down easily.
But the more words you add to what you need to say, the more likely it is that the message will be lost.
Mentally strong women have learned to say things clearly.
If someone else can’t handle it, that’s their problem, but at least they got the message.
Beating around the bush only gets you lost. It’s time to go straight through it.
4
They’re not too critical or hard on themselves
They’re not too critical or hard on themselves.
We think that by being hard on ourselves, we’ll hopefully wake up and get our act together.
But you’re only telling yourself that you stink, and who feels motivated to work harder after hearing that?
Nobody.
Mentally strong women know that things happen and that it’s human to make mistakes and everyone does it.
So when they do mess up, which is inevitable, they brush it right off, make genuine apologies if they need to, and get right back to what they wanted to do.
5
Don’t bring other women down
It’s the surest sign of someone who’s insecure and unhappy with themselves.
The moment you insult someone, whether it’s for the clothes they wear, the media they consume, or their intelligence, you immediately send a message that something about this woman threatens you.
Mentally strong women have no problem lifting other people up because they know there’s enough space at the top for everyone.
6
Don’t compare themselves to other women
They don’t compare themselves to other women.
Comparing yourself to someone else is more likely to bring you down because comparing uses cognitive bias, which directs us to focus more on the negative things.
Even if you think you’re doing it to lift yourself up, you’re going to notice the things you’re lacking and feel despondent.
And if you do find that you’re better than another woman at something, you’ll be doing number five—bringing her down.
7
Don’t complain without working towards a solution
Complaining is one of the things a strong woman doesn’t do without working towards a solution.
It’s okay to vent about a problem; everyone needs to let off some steam.
But constant complaining without taking action to fix what you’re complaining about shows that you don’t want a fix; you want attention.
It shows that you don’t want it to be resolved; you want something to talk about.
Talking about the same issue only dumbs you down and makes you focus on the same things over and over.
But when you talk about possible solutions, it’s like your mind opens up and you feel stronger and more competent.
8
Don’t lose all their friends
There are some friends you need to cut out of your life.
There are some friends you drift apart from.
But when you look around and none of your friends are in your life anymore, something is wrong.
Whether you’ve let the friendships go because you’ve been focused on work, your partner, or your family, whatever it is, you need good friends in your life.
It’s important to make the effort to keep them; it’s important to put some differences aside and not let petty things get in the way of a great friendship.
9
Don’t constantly argue with people
They don’t constantly argue with people. There’s a difference between standing up for yourself and allowing people to have power over your emotions.
When you’re constantly arguing with the same person or you find yourself in arguments with other people often, even if they’re wrong, you’re beating a dead horse and you have to ask yourself what you actually gain from it.
After some time, it’s clear that their opinion isn’t going to change, so what’s your end goal?
Mentally strong women don’t insist and take a step back after stating their point.
10
They don’t forsake self-care for other people
When you’re missing the self-care routines that calm you down, just so you can always be available for others—so that you can see everyone—you’re emptying your cup and never filling it.
Your cup has to stay as full as possible for you to be mentally strong, so these women know that the best way they can be there for others is to take care of themselves too.
Away with the people-pleasing, be gone with wearing yourself thin.
You are a priority too.
11
Don’t have an individualistic mindset
With that being about taking care of yourself, these women also don’t have an individualistic mindset.
While they’re okay with pursuing their own goals, desires, and needs, they know that cooperation is better than pure competition.
They don’t expect other people to know their boundaries, history, and problems.
While they’re independent and self-sufficient, they know the importance of community and coming together to help each other and stand by each other.
12
Don’t harshly judge other people
Now, humans do tend to pass judgment on other people.
It’s the way we make sense of things and form opinions and impressions.
But if we allow these judgments to run wild, we risk making up our own stories about people without knowing things from their side.
Mentally strong women know that with limited information, personal bias, and stereotypes, the judgment we pass on people is massively flawed, and we shouldn’t base our opinions and behavior towards them on this judgment alone.
13
They don’t deliberately exclude other people
Most people will be at a point in their life when they’re part of the “in” crowd and someone new walks in.
In high school, you might have been the one being excluded and now that someone else is coming in, it’s your chance to be the “cool” person, the one who makes someone squirm or welcomes them.
Women who aren’t mentally strong will feel threatened by other women for coming and they’ll try to exclude them and make them feel unwelcome.
But women who are mentally strong know that you’re stronger when you’re standing together, so they make an effort to include you.
14
Don’t spend the majority of their free time being unproductive
When we say we mean hours of the TV show or scrolling through your phone,
There’s a difference between downtime and wasting your time.
When you’re at home, you don’t have to move through your time on autopilot.
As a species, we’ve never been this lazy.
We’ve always worked, we’ve always had a goal and our minds and bodies are designed to move forward.
When we don’t, we stay stagnant.
So you have your time to move forward with something, whether it’s DIY-ing your house, learning new recipes, crafting, or working on your motorcycle or car.
The goal is to get off the couch.
15
Don’t allow anyone (but especially men) to dictate their actions and emotions
It’s easy for women to become frustrated with men because they tend to work and think differently.
This frustration can lead to explosive anger, a lot of hurt, and just being really, really annoyed.
And it can be that way with women too.
But a mentally strong woman calls upon the philosophers of Stoicism—they channel Marcus Aurelius and work on the principles of Plato—and knows that they can’t control the situation, but they can control their response.
That’s where the power is. Your attitude is ALL yours.
Being mentally strong is more of a phase than a lifetime personality trait.
We all get into bad situations that can make us more vulnerable and if we’re unfortunate enough to be around a person who takes advantage of this, they can tear you down and you have to rebuild that strength again.
Strength and weakness aren’t fixed. They’re not forever.
Like your fitness level, it takes consistent work and one injury can throw you off. So if you fall, give yourself some grace and then get up and get out there.
These are the 15 things mentally strong women don’t do! We hope you learned a powerful lesson today and we’ll see you next time!
